The Thriving Scale: A First Step to Greatness

The Thriving Scale: A First Step to Greatness 

Imagine that we’re teammates on an NFL football team.

We’re looking forward to attending a pre-season meeting where all of our fellow teammates will be gathered for the first time, as we anticipate the start of a brand-new season. We gather together, the room abuzz with excitement and energy. The coach confidently strides into the room, flanked by several members of our coaching staff. As he stands in the front of the room, he quietly scans our team.

He immediately sees that a number of the players are significantly overweight. Others, he learns from his coaching staff, have lagged on their off-season conditioning, and a few haven’t even worked out at all since the last season ended.

His face turns from one of hope and confidence to anger. Coach is outraged. He seethes, gritting through his teeth, “How can we have a top-notch, championship-caliber team, if my player’s lives are in disarray?” “How can we expect to win as a team, unless every single one of my players are winners in their own right?” Great questions, aren’t they? Let’s move this story out of the realm of the sports world. How many companies and business teams can hope to compete in an increasingly tough business climate when their employees’ lives are in shambles? Or how many families can hope to build strong, loving, enduring, constructive bonds when they have failed to set that example in the self-care of each individual?

The Thriving Scale: An Instant Life Barometer

Over the years I’ve used the Thriving Scale as a self-assessment measure of one’s personal well-being. It’s a simple snapshot of the quality of your present life situation.

Take a brief introspective moment right now to consider the holistic state of your life. 

Give yourself a 1 if you’re hanging on by your fingernails. Many of us have been a “1” at times in our lives. Life isn’t always easy. Illness, a sudden death, loss of a job, or an accident can send us quickly to the edge of the cliff. When we’re a “1,” it’s a struggle to just put one foot in front of the other and to keep from giving up. 

Give yourself a 2 if your life is slowly eroding. For whatever reason, you feel as if you are heading in the wrong direction. Perhaps you’ve lost your dreams, or you’re stuck in a dead-end job or a destructive relationship. You know your current circumstances are hurting you and you really aren’t doing anything effective to change. 

Give yourself a 3 if you are treading water. Life isn’t getting worse, but it isn’t getting any better either. You aren’t excited about your future. You don’t feel like you are learning anything new or progressing. But it’s also true that you aren’t getting weaker or losing ground. 

Give yourself a 4 if you are learning, growing, and moving in a positive direction. You have dreams for your future–and you’re progressing toward them. Life seems bright and positive. You sense that you’re winning the game.

Give yourself a 5 if you are firing on all cylinders, you’re creatively engaged in your work, your relationships are thriving and you feel at the top of your game. All aspects of your life are in order and balanced perfectly. Life doesn’t get any better than this. In the hundreds or even thousands of times I’ve asked people where they land on the Thriving Scale, less than a handful of people have given themselves a “5.” Most people have said they’re either a “3” or “4.” And I often wonder if people are reluctant to give themselves a “1” or “2” because they would feel embarrassed in front of their peers. The goal of the Thriving Scale isn’t to shame anyone for the current state of their life. Rather, it’s to create awareness. It really doesn’t matter where you are on the Thriving Scale, as long as you are willing to take 100 percent responsibility for the current state of your life.

If you’re a 1, do you have a plan to be a 2? If you’re a 2, what will you do to be a 3? If you’re a 4, how can you move up the scale? Next, make a list of the issues you need to address to move up the Scale. Take a few minutes and list everything that comes to mind. It never ceases to amaze me that no one ever has trouble completing this exercise.

We don’t need a doctor, a boss or a therapist to tell us what we need to take on. We intuitively know that:

• We’ve stopped dreaming
• We eat too much
• Our blood pressure is too high and isn’t being treated
• We haven’t had a physical exam for 5 years
• Our marriage is in disrepair
• We aren’t working out
• We drink too much alcohol
• We don’t like our job and just do it for the money

The list goes on and on. I’m shocked when people tell them that this is nothing they haven’t known all along. That’s like coming out of the bathroom with your zipper down, and when a colleague points it out, you respond, “Yeah, I know. But I don’t have time to get around to addressing that issue.” Who would do that? Yet we allow issues in our lives to go unaddressed as if we aren’t embarrassing ourselves with our lack of self-care and weakening the teams we are on. So, I ask you to take action.

1. Pick one thing from your list of things you must do to move up the thriving scale.
2. Set a goal with a date of completion.
3. Create 3 to 5 strategies to address the issue.
4. Tell at least 3 friends what you are doing and ask for their support.
5. Create action steps for each strategy.
6. Put the action steps on your calendar.
7. Execute on them.

When you fail, don’t feel guilty, simply get back on track. We need for your life to be thriving if we are to work together to create something great.

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